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The Living For Jesus Good News!; We know what you're doing; now everyone else can!
Topic Started: Jul 21 2008, 12:58 PM (1,168 Views)
Leo	Jul 21 2008, 12:58 PM Post #1
the Insurgent Posts: 1,326 Group: Admins Member #8 Joined: Jul 7, 2008	Sign up for a subscription to your local newspaper; the Living For Jesus Good News! Published Monday through Friday with new headlines daily!!! When rolled up can also be used to pop your husband with; wrap fish with and makes a dandy liner to paper train your pets!!! Leo (Editor in Chief)



Amalthea	Jul 21 2008, 05:44 PM Post #2
The Singing Silver Unicorn Posts: 6,951 Group: Global Moderators Member #6 Joined: Jul 6, 2008	I'd like to subscribe! (To READ, Snowy...Honest!!!)



Leo	Jul 22 2008, 11:36 AM Post #3
the Insurgent Posts: 1,326 Group: Admins Member #8 Joined: Jul 7, 2008	Living For Jesus Good News:! All the news that fits we print! L4J PUBLIC SAFETY PURCHASES 50,000 WATER BALLOONS! When asked why such a large purchase was made Deputy Barny was quoted as saying, "We're going to clean up this town!" EXPLOSION AT THE ACME SUPPLY COMPANY! Photo: Store owner Leo was unavailable for comment, but one of his employees was quoted as saying, L4J's Merchant of the week! Jemila's Photogenic Clinic! The place to go for all your photographic needs. Remember their slogan: We can even make you look good! Before--> After-->



Amber	Jul 22 2008, 06:23 PM Post #4
Praying for our Nation Posts: 2,499 Group: Admins Member #1 Joined: Jul 5, 2008



Amber	Jul 22 2008, 06:24 PM Post #5
Praying for our Nation Posts: 2,499 Group: Admins Member #1 Joined: Jul 5, 2008



Jemila	Jul 22 2008, 06:31 PM Post #6
Resident Violin Playing Plumber Posts: 5,986 Group: Admins Member #2 Joined: Jul 5, 2008	Leo Jul 22 2008, 11:36 AM Living For Jesus Good News:! All the news that fits we print! L4J PUBLIC SAFETY PURCHASES 50,000 WATER BALLOONS! When asked why such a large purchase was made Deputy Barny was quoted as saying, "We're going to clean up this town!" EXPLOSION AT THE ACME SUPPLY COMPANY! Photo: Store owner Leo was unavailable for comment, but one of his employees was quoted as saying, L4J's Merchant of the week! Jemila's Photogenic Clinic! The place to go for all your photographic needs. Remember their slogan: We can even make you look good! Before--> After--> Hahahahahahahahah!



Jemila	Jul 23 2008, 05:41 AM Post #7
Resident Violin Playing Plumber Posts: 5,986 Group: Admins Member #2 Joined: Jul 5, 2008	Extra Extra Read All About It: Jemila's Photegenic Clinic doctored pix of one celebrity lookalike: Miss Eliza Doolittle has a twin!!!



Jemila	Jul 23 2008, 05:43 AM Post #8
Resident Violin Playing Plumber Posts: 5,986 Group: Admins Member #2 Joined: Jul 5, 2008	Shhhhhhhh... caught a picture of Leo enjoying his own newspaper....



Leo	Jul 23 2008, 01:51 PM Post #9
the Insurgent Posts: 1,326 Group: Admins Member #8 Joined: Jul 7, 2008	Living For Jesus Good News:! All the news that fits we print! EXPLOSION AT THE ACME SUPPLY COMPANY! Again Local supply company Acme Supply was engulfed today in a mysterious explosion! Deputy Barney, who was present at the time of the explosion had this to say, "I need to get another bullet for my gun." The entire store was gutted by flames and burned completely to the ground. Employees say the store will be open for business tomorrow morning. One employee was quoted as saying, "What'd ya expect? I mean, this happens daily." Employees from Amber's Water Balloon store had the flames extinguished before Fire trucks arrived at the scene. MYSTERIOUS FLOOD STRIKES DOWNTOWN AREA! Public Safety is investigating, but has no leads at this time! L4J's Merchant of the week! Amber's Cafe: Good food at Great Prices! Come in for our weekly special! The prices are all the same, but before you eat them the food will entertain you!



Amber	Jul 23 2008, 02:39 PM Post #10
Praying for our Nation Posts: 2,499 Group: Admins Member #1 Joined: Jul 5, 2008



Snowowl	Jul 24 2008, 02:01 PM Post #11
Bearer of the Water Balloons Posts: 850 Group: Global Moderators Member #5 Joined: Jul 6, 2008	FIFE FOR MAYOR. A VOTE FOR BARNEY IS A VOTE FOR SAFE STREETS.



yngmom4	Jul 25 2008, 10:24 PM Post #12
Who's yours? Posts: 9,120 Group: Admins Member #12 Joined: Jul 7, 2008	Yngmom4 for mayor - Hey, if I can manage four kids, a husband, and college, I can certainly manage this town!



Jemila	Jul 25 2008, 10:26 PM Post #13
Resident Violin Playing Plumber Posts: 5,986 Group: Admins Member #2 Joined: Jul 5, 2008	You have my vote!!!



Amber	Jul 25 2008, 10:32 PM Post #14
Praying for our Nation Posts: 2,499 Group: Admins Member #1 Joined: Jul 5, 2008	how much for my vote I am of course kidding :halo: :halo:



yngmom4	Jul 25 2008, 10:35 PM Post #15
Who's yours? Posts: 9,120 Group: Admins Member #12 Joined: Jul 7, 2008	I'm sorry, my integrity will not allow me to pay any bribes for votes! You are welcome to vote for me for free, though!



Amber	Jul 25 2008, 10:40 PM Post #16
Praying for our Nation Posts: 2,499 Group: Admins Member #1 Joined: Jul 5, 2008



Amalthea	Jul 26 2008, 02:31 AM Post #17
The Singing Silver Unicorn Posts: 6,951 Group: Global Moderators Member #6 Joined: Jul 6, 2008	Pssst! I received a HOT TIP: Quote: No way, man...Leo was with me, eating snocones! So he couldn't possibly have been responsible! Could this have been a PAID WITNESS? Could our Mayoral Candidate be in league with an Insurgent? *Enquiring Minds want to know!!!*



carinyosa99	Jul 26 2008, 05:23 AM Post #18
Angel of The Lord Posts: 2,168 Group: Members Member #24 Joined: Jul 12, 2008	OK...I just read snocones as sconces......I've been doing my general contracting work too long!!!



Jemila	Jul 26 2008, 10:27 AM Post #19
Resident Violin Playing Plumber Posts: 5,986 Group: Admins Member #2 Joined: Jul 5, 2008	carinyosa99 Jul 26 2008, 05:23 AM OK...I just read snocones as sconces......I've been doing my general contracting work too long!!!



yngmom4	Jul 26 2008, 06:05 PM Post #20
Who's yours? Posts: 9,120 Group: Admins Member #12 Joined: Jul 7, 2008	Me...in league with an insurgent? Never! I just don't like to eat my snocones alone!



Leo	Jul 28 2008, 09:55 AM Post #21
the Insurgent Posts: 1,326 Group: Admins Member #8 Joined: Jul 7, 2008	Living For Jesus Good News:! All the news that fits we print! Living For Jesus Good News has decided to endorse Yngmom4 for Mayor! Our reasons for doing so are due to her intelligence, her integrity and the fact that she hasn't blown up or flooded any local businesses! Further Deputy Barny has shown himself to be reckless with police equipment and, despite his denials, his previous employment was the result of nepotism having been hired by his cousin Andy prior to coming to the employ of L4J's Public Safety. When told that Good News was endorsing his opponent Deputy Barny was quoted as saying, " :madface: " EXPLOSION AT THE ACME SUPPLY COMPANY! This is getting to be a habit! Local supply company Acme Supply was engulfed today in a mysterious explosion! Again An employee on the scene was quoted as saying, " " L4J GOOD NEWS OWNER QUESTIONED IN MYSTERIOUS FLOOD! Public Safety recently posed these questions to L4J Good News owner Leo. "Where is your fire hose at this moment? When was the last time you had it? Where were you Tuesday night into Wednesday morning? " Leo's response to these questions were, "The last time I saw that fire hose was as the ambulance was carrying me away from it! One of our leading citizens and a very respected plumber, Jemila, took charge of it at that point shutting it off. Given Jemila's competence I can assure our citizens that the hose did not leak or cause this flood after Jemila turned it off. I have dealt with that fire hose twice and both times has resulted in my receiving concussions, contussions, several broken bones, dental problems and a boo-boo on my elbow! Personally I'd rather pet a cobra then ever mess with that thing again! As for my whereabouts Tuesday night and Wednesday morning I was in bed and have a witness! Just ask my Teddy! " L4J's Merchant of the week! Victorian Insurance Company: Remember our motto: "If you think you have to be crazy to live in this town think how crazy we are to insure you!" Special discount for businesses and homes that haven't blown up in the last 30 days! =



yngmom4	Jul 28 2008, 09:00 PM Post #22
Who's yours? Posts: 9,120 Group: Admins Member #12 Joined: Jul 7, 2008	Thanks for the endorsement, Leo! And I believe you about the firehouse!



Jemila	Jul 28 2008, 09:49 PM Post #23
Resident Violin Playing Plumber Posts: 5,986 Group: Admins Member #2 Joined: Jul 5, 2008	Leo, thanks for the vote of confidence!!! And, thanks for the ad, love the motto!!!!!!



Amber	Jul 28 2008, 10:01 PM Post #24
Praying for our Nation Posts: 2,499 Group: Admins Member #1 Joined: Jul 5, 2008



Snowowl	Jul 29 2008, 04:57 PM Post #25
Bearer of the Water Balloons Posts: 850 Group: Global Moderators Member #5 Joined: Jul 6, 2008	Well now here is a real interesting turn of events. The candidate for mayor's dark past. Quote: yngmom4Jul 29 2008, 12:45 AM Sweet...I miss my hot wheels...but that's why I had kids, so I can steal theirs! And from childen no less.



yngmom4	Jul 29 2008, 10:49 PM Post #26
Who's yours? Posts: 9,120 Group: Admins Member #12 Joined: Jul 7, 2008	Alright, Barney, you've had it in this town! I'm not waiting for the election to run you out of here! This town ain't big enough for both of us, so you better git to steppin' faster than you've ever stepped in yer life, pal! If you ain't cleared out of here by morning, I swear I'll . You get that... this => is you if you're still here in the morning! You'll be to your mommy like a little baby girl if I catch you in my town! People will be buying and kicking back to watch you . So take my advice and run, so I don't have to embarrass you in front of all these people who don't like you anyway!



Leo	Jul 30 2008, 05:52 AM Post #27
the Insurgent Posts: 1,326 Group: Admins Member #8 Joined: Jul 7, 2008



Amber	Jul 30 2008, 09:11 AM Post #28
Praying for our Nation Posts: 2,499 Group: Admins Member #1 Joined: Jul 5, 2008	yngmom4 Jul 29 2008, 10:49 PM Alright, Barney, you've had it in this town! I'm not waiting for the election to run you out of here! This town ain't big enough for both of us, so you better git to steppin' faster than you've ever stepped in yer life, pal! If you ain't cleared out of here by morning, I swear I'll . You get that... this => is you if you're still here in the morning! You'll be to your mommy like a little baby girl if I catch you in my town! People will be buying and kicking back to watch you . So take my advice and run, so I don't have to embarrass you in front of all these people who don't like you anyway!



Gadget_Girl	Jul 30 2008, 09:50 AM Post #29
Resident Drama Queen Posts: 5,395 Group: Admins Member #33 Joined: Jul 23, 2008



Gadget_Girl	Jul 30 2008, 09:53 AM Post #30
Resident Drama Queen Posts: 5,395 Group: Admins Member #33 Joined: Jul 23, 2008	On a more serious note (like middle C). Leo, when you get a chance I'd like to run an ad for the Performing Arts Center. I'd also like to make sure we get a paper subscription for the Center.



Jemila	Jul 30 2008, 10:47 AM Post #31
Resident Violin Playing Plumber Posts: 5,986 Group: Admins Member #2 Joined: Jul 5, 2008



Jemila	Jul 30 2008, 10:48 AM Post #32
Resident Violin Playing Plumber Posts: 5,986 Group: Admins Member #2 Joined: Jul 5, 2008	Leo.... would you run an add for free violin lessons by moi? Thanks!!!!!



Leo	Jul 30 2008, 11:44 AM Post #33
the Insurgent Posts: 1,326 Group: Admins Member #8 Joined: Jul 7, 2008	Living For Jesus Good News:! All the news that fits we print! Candidate Yngmom4 Gives Speech! Candidate for Mayor Yngmom4 gave a speech today that was exceeding well received by local citizens. Photo: In rebuttal; her opponent (and general doofus), Deputy Barney was quoted as saying, " " EXPLOSION AT THE ACME SUPPLY COMPANY! So what else is new? Local supply company Acme Supply was engulfed today in a mysterious explosion! An employee on the scene was quoted as saying, " Does anyone here know what combustible means? " Former Deputy Barney Indicted! Former Deputy Barney and aspiring mayoral candidate has been dismissed from the L4J Public Safety Office and apprently indicted on charges of being a doofus! Former Deputy Barney is considered armed and dangerous! (Duh. Have you ever heard of anyone being armed and cuddly?) Barney has been known to assume various disguises as seen below: L4J's Merchant of the week! L4J Performing Arts Center: Visit our new theatres! This week's double feature: Godzilla Meet the Parents Our motto: We're not just acting crazy! Paid advertisement: For violin lessons call Jemila at 123-4567. She has 100% uh, 99% customer satisfaction!



yngmom4	Jul 30 2008, 09:20 PM Post #34
Who's yours? Posts: 9,120 Group: Admins Member #12 Joined: Jul 7, 2008	:ROFL:



Jemila	Jul 30 2008, 09:46 PM Post #35
Resident Violin Playing Plumber Posts: 5,986 Group: Admins Member #2 Joined: Jul 5, 2008	Thanks Leo!!!



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